“So… how’s everything going?” — Why the GROW Model is your new best friend in coaching conversations

We’ve all been there. You finally sit down for that long-overdue one-to-one with a team member, and out comes the classic opener: “So… how’s everything going?”

Cue awkward silence. Shuffling. A polite smile. And then a vague, “Yeah, good, thanks.”

Not exactly the stuff of coaching greatness.

If you’re a new leader trying to build stronger connections with your team but feeling like your one-to-ones are stuck in small-talk mode, you’re not alone. It turns out that meaningful conversations don’t just happen by magic. They need a little structure, and that’s where the GROW model steps in.

What is GROW and why should you care?

GROW stands for Goal, Reality, Options, Will (or Way forward). It's a simple yet powerful framework that helps guide coaching conversations, making them focused, forward-thinking, and genuinely useful.

And the best part? You don’t need a clipboard, a psychology degree, or hours of extra prep. You just need a curious mindset, a few good questions, and your trusty RedSeed 1:1 to guide the way.

Here’s how it works (with a RedSeed twist)

Instead of opening with “So… anything to talk about?” (aka conversation quicksand), try this:

1. G is for Goal

Ask: “What’s something you’d like to improve or feel more confident about at work?”

This helps your team member name the destination, instead of circling around vague ideas.

RedSeed tip: Add their goal straight into the 1:1 tool so you can both track it over time. Boom — built-in accountability.

2. R is for Reality

Ask: “What’s happening now that’s making that feel tricky?”

You’re now gently peeling back the layers. This is where insight lives.

RedSeed vibe: Listen more than you talk. You’re a guide here, not a fixer.

3. O is for Options

Ask: “What are a few things you could try?”

This is where your team member gets creative — and you fight the urge to jump in with a list of suggestions (yes, we know that can be hard).

RedSeed add-on: You could suggest a relevant RedSeed course if it makes sense and would support them in their development.

4. W is for Will (or Way forward)

Ask: “What’s one small step you’ll take this week?”

Now you’re moving from chat to action.

RedSeed hack: You could use the 1:1 ‘Set a SMART goal’ template to capture the action, add a due date, and follow up next time.

Why leaders love GROW (once they give it a go)

It’s normal to feel unsure when you’re just starting out as a leader. You want to connect, support, and coach, but without a structure, conversations can either drift or feel forced.

The GROW model gives you just enough of a roadmap to keep things focused without being robotic. It makes your team feel heard and helps you feel like… well, a leader who knows what they’re doing.

Add RedSeed 1:1 into the mix, and you’ve got structure, accountability, and a record of all the coaching gold you’re building — without needing to scribble notes on the back of an old lunch receipt.

Final thought

Next time you head into a one-on-one and that dreaded “how’s it going” hovers on your lips, switch gears.

Ask a GROW-style question instead — and watch how much more open, focused, and energising your coaching conversations can be.

You’ll build trust. You’ll spark action. And best of all, you’ll never dread another 1:1 again.

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